Very often, we are so caught up with the urgent stuff in life and we seek instant gratification for the things we do. As a result, we neglect to do the important things that will make a difference for ourselves in the long run.

Going for a run may not give instant results. However, do it on a regular basis and the rewards may slowly appear. Reading a book may not provide instant success. However, the knowledge that you learn and apply may eventually add greater value to your life, and perhaps even to the people around you.

So take a moment and ponder about it. What will you do today, that will matter tomorrow or in the long run?

Very often, when we set a goal for ourselves and strive to achieve it, challenges will start appearing to test our determination and commitment. I’m quite sure you would have faced such situations before:

Just when you decided to keep yourself fit by going for a run in the morning, it rains the next day. Or how about the time when you decided you should start saving money for a year end holiday and you see your favourite shop having a sale in the papers one week later?

Now despite all these challenges and inconveniences, I’ve also realised that when we make a commitment to ourselves and give our fullest effort, things can happen. So the next time you set a goal for yourself and challenges appear,  hang in there. Continue to put in your fullest effort and very often when you least expect it, results start appearing.

I was talking to a friend over the weekend about public speaking, and he told me, “There’s no way I can speak in front of a crowd. Just the thought of it scares me silly” So the conversation went on like this:

“What’s the size of the crowd you have in mind?”

“Maybe a few hundred? I see an auditorium full of people”

“Oh. What if you changed the scenario to a tiny classroom with four people?”

“Huh? Four people? That’s not public speaking right?”

I think many people have the same perception as my friend. When it comes to public speaking, the first thing that comes to mind is the thought of many many people. As far as I’m concerned, speaking to two others can be public speaking too. Over the years, I’ve helped many people improve on their public speaking skills, and the one thing that consistently gives them encouragement and assurance is the referential experience of having done it before.

So to speak to a crowd of a hundred without first having the experience of speaking to a crowd of say.. seventy, is like having to cook for a christmas dinner without first knowing how to cook instant noodles (Ok, that’s the best example I can come up with at this hour).

My point of saying all these is, if the thought of speaking in front of a large crowd scares you, then start small. Use that as a reference to acknowledge that you can handle a particular group size, then progressively move on to larger audiences. It is a slow and sure way of building up the confidence for speaking to large number of people.

How often have we been limited by our doubts, resulting in a reality that is less than what we could have achieved?

and

A chapter in Being A Happy Teen talks about how important it is to always give our best in what we do. Even if we do not succeed, we still feel a sense of happiness for giving our all. When you give your best, people can feel it, and they will appreciate it.

One story i remember fondly in the book talks about how, at the Sydney Olympics in 2000, the world was brought to its feet by someone who totally personified the Olympic spirit. Eric Moussambani swam for Equatorial Guinea in the 100 meters event. The thing is, Eric has never seen an Olympic swimming pool before. He trains in a little hotel pool when there are no guests around.

During the heats, the other two competitors were disqualified for false starts, so Eric swam against the clock himself. It was the first time Eric had ever swum in a 100 meters race, and he was struggling to finish even the first lap! In the second lap, he was nearly drowning!

But Eric refused to give up, and fought with everything he could give. As he struggled his way back, the noise in the arena was deafening! With every stroke, the noise got louder. Some spectators were crying, some were praying, some could not even bear to watch. When Eric finally hit the wall, he brought the roof down!

Eric clocked a time of 1 minute 52 seconds, probably one of the slowest times in Olympic history. But did anyone care? No! He became a hero in everybody’s heart. Just by giving his best!

I’m sure many of us had such an experience before. When you were touched by the determination and courage of individuals, and couldn’t help but root for them. Of course, you might think to yourself, “But that’s the Olympics.. I’m just swimming in a small school meet”.

Well hey, do your best in a school meet, and someone will spot you and you might one day swim in the Olympics as well. Make it a point to give your best, however small scale it may be, and it’ll lead to the bigger stage.

Are you giving your best?

Very often in my trainings, i come across individuals who are not willing to give their best for various reasons. Here are some of the common ones,

“”The customers don’t deserve it” – If you think about it clearly, the customers don’t suffer because of the lack of effort. Usually the one who ends up on the losing end is the staff. A lot is at stake here. Morale, Reputation, Self Worth, Career, etc.

“I’ll put in more effort if my salary increases” – This is an interesting statement, because if I’m the boss, I’ll be looking at it the other way round. “I’ll increase your salary, when you put in more effort”.

“Nobody recognises my work, why should i work so hard?” – How do you know? You never know who is observing your work. And if you’re in customer service, you never know who your customer really is, and the potential opportunities that could be coming your way.

Of course, I’m not saying we should give our best because of secondary gains. The bottom line is, it is important to give our best because it builds up our character. Always giving our best builds up the respect for ourselves. We live our life with integrity and self worth, and results will show eventually.

]]> http://www.successwithcommunication.com/archives/80/feed 0 http://www.successwithcommunication.com/archives/16 http://www.successwithcommunication.com/archives/16#comments Mon, 02 Mar 2009 13:52:22 +0000 Joelseah http://www.joel-seah.com/?p=16 The term Paradigm Shift was first introduced by Thomas Kuhn in his book, The Structure of Scientific Revolutions. Today, the word paradigm is commonly used to represent a thought pattern or perception, which in turn affects our attitudes and behaviours. Paradigm Shift in this sense means to change our limiting thoughts and perceptions.

The Map Is Not The Territory - A map is simply an explanation of how an actual territory is like. It lists details such as buildings and roads, however, the map is not the actual territory, it is just a representation.

Every one of us would agree that the illustration above makes sense. Some might even add that it is common sense. Now, if we stop to think about it, many of us are actually making the mistake of treating our map as THE territory. Allow me to draw some parallels here.

The territory here refers to the actual world out there, the world that goes on without our control. The map refers to our perception of the world. Every one uses a different map, depending on culture, society, upbringing, language, experiences, etc. In a nutshell, we perceive the world according to our maps, our realities. How i perceive a given situation may not be the same as you, and vice versa. Yet, how often have we treated our reality as the only reality?

For The World To Change, I Must First Change – This statement places you in an empowering state of mind by acknowledging that you are in control of your thoughts. The moment you change your perception, the world around you changes too.

In Stephen R. Covey’s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, he wrote about an experience he had in a train. A man and his kids boarded the train, and while his kids were yelling and throwing things around, he just sat there doing nothing. It was clear that everyone in the train was irritated, and when he couldn’t take it anymore, Covey turned to the man and asked if he could control his kids. The man apologised and explained that he was feeling at a loss because the kids’ mother died in hospital just an hour ago.

Imagine how his perception would have changed immediately, and how that change would have led him from a feeling of irritation to one of compassion. Bringing up this story is just to reinforce the idea that what we see and think may not be what it really is. We choose what we want to perceive as our reality. Being aware of this allows us to constantly place ourselves in an empowering state of mind, and make us better communicators!

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